Thursday, September 30, 2010

Poll Winner: Starbucks Poetry

Ah, a (rare) quiet night at home.  The Husband has flown off and left me again - this time for Florida (again).  Yes, we have another wedding this weekend, this time in Panama City, for our friends Bobby and Sarah!  I've got to get to some stories on the things I've witnessed at weddings.  With those tales I will either convince you to never go to a wedding again, let alone have one of your own -- or make you want to go to as many weddings as possible, just to see what might happen. 

Anyhow, the Husband is kicking it with his high school friends tonight, while I slack off at home before a morning of work and an afternoon of flying.  I've currently got some scones in the oven (you may recall that I'm internally kind of ancient), so I brought my laptop down to the kitchen to keep me company while they're baking.  Otherwise, I would forget they were in the oven and probably go to bed and burn the house down.  Which would be a darn shame, after spending all that time on the bathroom floor.

 For everybody who voted in the poll, thank you for selecting Starbucks as my next haiku topic!  For those of you who didn't vote... tough lattes! :)

Anyway, here are some Starbucks haikus... plus a BONUS limerick (for whoever wanted limericks)!


STARBUCKS LIMERICK
Pray tell me, now, is it insane
To be going to Starbucks again?
I think if they could,
Then I surely would
Have them shoot it straight into my vein.


Now for the haikus....


PERSONAL MUG
I'm eco-conscious!
(But also I just want my
ten cents off... don't judge.)


GREEN TEA
People seem to think
You're healthy and tasty.  Well...
I'm not fooled.  You're gross.


A DOUBLE TALL SOY, TWO-PUMP CARAMEL LATTE, NO WHIP EXTRA FOAM
Could make a haiku
Simply out of this drink name...
Now that's a bit much.


FIRST-DAY CASHIER
Too many buttons.
I could tell you what to push,
But I'd just seem rude.




CINNAMON DOLCE LATTE
Thanks for being you!
Scrumptious, warm, and fulfilling.
You're my favorite. ;-)




STARBUCKS ICED DOUBLESHOT
(Psst... YOU are my fave.
Don't listen to the latte.
You're lighter, too. WIN!)


CHAI
Spice and cinnamon
Hooray!  You are delicious!
... but I need caffeine... :(


DECAF
Why do you exist?
The whole point of coffee is
CAFFEINE, fool!  GET SOME!




FRUSTRATION
You were behind me.
Yes, we ordered the same drink,
BUT THAT ONE IS MINE!!!




WRONG DRINK
I take the first sip -
Crap. They left out the syrup.
This tastes like failure.


I'm going to put up another poll for haiku topics soon, so please vote on what you want to hear next.  Or leave suggestions in the comments... or send your carrier pigeons along.  I'm flexible.  But seriously, if in 2008 you went to all the trouble of registering to vote and getting out of work/class/bed to go to the polling center and cast your vote for Obama whomever you wanted for President, then checking a box on your computer screen should be gravy!  In other words, I want to know what you want to read.  So VOTE PLZ!

1 comment:

  1. HA this is brilliant!
    I like to bitch in Haiku, maybe you will like it too? here's the post
    http://www.thewritingwomb.com/2010/05/my-rants-in-haiku-because-bitching-is.html

    I am loving your blog...found it through giddy fingers on her blog roll and have instantly fallen in love with it *sigh*
    keep up the awesome work...gonna go spend some time going through your old posts now looking forward to it with a gross green tea in my hand *smiley face* i think the :o) has lost it's meaning so when i write it out in long form, people know i really mean it *smiley face*
    I am adding you as a friend and also putting you up on my blog roll so i can stalk all the awesome posts you write! Don't get creeped out, stalking is sexy on the internet all the cool kids are doing it, consider it a compliment *winky face*

    ReplyDelete