Thursday, August 12, 2010

The Eco-Fairy

Remember how I mentioned the Puss-in-Boots stare-downs on the morning commute?  The Husband and I didn't have one of those today (although there was a MAJOR one yesterday -- still not sure who won), because we talked about macroeconomic/ecological theory instead.

This was not necessarily a good idea, as I hadn't had my coffee yet, and I was in the process of applying my make-up as we motored along toward campus in our car, so I couldn't really devote my full attention to the discussion at hand.  I'm not sure if it would EVER be a "good" idea, actually.  Anyhow, we were talking about organic farming, because we are going to the Husband's family farm in Iowa this weekend and he's going to talk to his uncle about getting the farm certified as organic.  Our (abridged) conversation proceeded something like this:

Husband - Y'know, I heard somewhere about this guy - can't remember his name - who had some sort of theory about how if every farm was organic, then there wouldn't be enough food for everyone in the world, and a bunch of people would starve.  He won the Nobel Prize for his research.
Me - ... huh.
(apparently they give away Nobel prizes for just about ANYTHING these days.  Maybe I can win two in one year after all!)
Me - I remember there was some theorist in my economics book who said the same thing, only he was talking about food in general and he lived in the 1600s or something.*  He said we were all doomed to starvation.
(I instinctively hug my legs to my chest, because I referred to Freakonomics)
Husband - ... yep.
(three minutes of silence)
Me - Well, that was depressing.
Husband - (laughs) Well, mphemmmphpmsnmnmnsh... (maybe I was a little more focused on my mascara at this point)... Ecological Fairy.
(I snap to attention at the word fairy)
Me - WHAT?
Husband - mperhmmsmndsh Macro-Ecological Theory.
(I slump back, disappointed)
Me - Oh.  I thought you said something about a fairy... BUT WAIT.  WHAT IF THERE WAS ONE?
Husband - ... What if there was what?
Me - A Macro-Ecological Fairy!  A fairy that flew around, telling us how to take care of the earth!

And we were off to the races.  How much better would the world be, if we had an Eco-Fairy to take care of us all?  Not like a Captain Planet with a grass mullet and some magical rings kerfuffle.  That is so 1991.  No, we need a strong, independent, stylin', mighty Eco-Fairy for the 21st Century!  What would such a fantastical being look like?

Our first thought was of Recyclops:

























Then for some reason, we thought of Hector the Stalker:

















(ZOMG, I never realized the Stranger-Danger Kid was sitting next to him!)

Imagine these two personas melded into one, serving the planet Earth as the benevolent, metrosexual, socially-backward, overly-intense
ECO-FAIRY!

If the environment was protected by THIS, I think we would all sleep a little better at night:
























... Then again, maybe not.

(*Thomas Robert Malthus, 1766-1834. I was a little off on the timeline. But his theory is depressing and hasn't come true yet. So I win, Thomas Malthus, and you lose. Actually, you were an economist, so you double-lose.)

1 comment:

  1. What an amazing concept! Great writing! I miss conversations with you and the Husband : )-Carley

    ReplyDelete